Plannig Ahead

Failure to plan on your part is not really my problem.  If you are going out of town and taking a laptop that you have never used before it might be a good idea to make sure you can log into the thing before you leave and not wait until you are 500 miles away to call and get grumpy that it doesn't work.  If you have some special thing you are going to do in class, try it before your class starts to make sure it will work.  Don't call me in a panic because you need some off-the-wall thing that has to be done 10 minutes ago or your class will be canceled.  I understand your pain, but it's not my fault, and there's just not a heck of a lot I can do about it.  So sorry.

It's called "college" for a reason

This isn't high school any more kiddies.  This is College.  It means you have to take responsibility for a lot of things, particularly your homework.  If you are an introductory computer science student, and have to have your mommy call and ask "What is a compiler and where do we get one" you are probably not going to make it.  If you call and all you can tell us is "I can't do my file thing" you are probably not going to make it.  If you can't understand the what PuTTY is used for (google it some time, dear readers if you haven't heard of it) you are probably not meant for computer science.  Oh, and by the way, the Help Desk Guy will not write your programs for you either. Nor can we debug one if it won't compile.  Especially since you don't even know what a compiler is or where you can get one.

Yes, it was all the same student. 

It's really not that difficult

I promise.  It's not that hard to set a password.  Granted, the rules are fairly strict, but as you can see, they are listed in detail on the password changer page. 

 

No one should have to spend 30 minutes on the phone while you try and create something that meets the rules.  Nor should you have to have it reset 3 times while in the process of creating one because you can't remember what you choose long enough to log in with it.  

Stupid Stuff I See part 2

Actual survey response:

Paper certainly got there, however as soon as it was loaded into the tray the gentleman delivering paper Batmanned (meaning he silently escaped through an open window). Immediately after the printer jammed and I was forced to clear it for want of my documents. Due to this I had to rush to lab covered in evidence of my printer battle thus earning me the nickname Thomas Toner Hands. While moniker is totally made up I do wish the Tech had stuck around to make sure the printer worked, that he didn't overload it.


Bonus points for creativity.

How did you not notice that?

Staff Caller: "I think the UPS has gone out. It's making a terrible noise"
Help Desk Guy hears the noise of the thing. Sounds like it has either lost power or has failed.
Help Desk: "It hasn't come unplugged or loose has it?"
Staff Caller: "Nope, first thing I checked"
Help Desk Guy: "Ok, we'll have some one come and see if we can get you plugged in somewhere else for now while we get the UPS checked"

Time passes

Staff Caller: "Never mind. It looks like the power is off on our whole floor."

More random stupid

Faculty caller :"I don't know my user ID, password or ID number. Can you help?"

Student Caller: "I can't log into email. It asks for a user ID. What's that?"

badPwdCount 33

Help Desk Guy: "IT help desk this is Help Desk Guy"
Student Caller : "Is this the IT help desk"
Help Desk guy refrains from saying "No moron. I answer the phone like that for fun"
Help Desk Guy: "Yes it is"
Student Caller: "I got an email saying my system has been blocked from the network for a virus and I have to reformat and re-install my operating system to be allowed back on the network. What does this mean?"
Seriously?
Help Desk Guy: "It means you have a virus. You need to reformat your computer to clean it. That means reinstalling your operating system as well"
Student Caller: "So I have to reformat?"
Help Desk Guy: "Yes"
Student Caller "Then reinstall my Windows?"
Help Desk Guy: "yes"
Student Caller "How do I get around that?"
Help Desk Guy "You don't if you want to use the network again"
Student Caller "So what does this mean?"
Seriously?

Stupid Stuff I See

Text of actual ticket submitted:

Two computers have been down recovering from a virus for apparently 3-ish weeks. I didn't know that computers were like people and needed downtime to work their stuff out, but apparently I was misinformed. These computers really need to be operational for quizzing and teaching purposes as a week is no big deal, but 3 is really starting to push it and hinder the various classes that use the room, mine included. Any help would be awesome, or just tell me that I can pour some chicken soup on the keyboard to fix it, put them out of their misery, or something.

Not sure if smart ass or... yeah, just smart ass.

Random Stupid

Some repeat offenders today.

Staff Caller "The computer says 'Dell'. That means it's a Mac right?" Yes, it was the same guy

Help Desk Guy: "Is your start button round or square?"
Student Caller (Chem Post-Doc) "It's round" wait for it... "No, wait. I guess it's square"

Student Ticket (paraphrasing): "I responding to phishing. Changing my password isn't enough. Please change my user ID so I don't have identity theft (yes, that was his exact words)"


badPwdCount 57 'nuff said about that one

Still Phishing

Another round of phishing. It seems to be a Monday thing, as we have a new round every Monday several weeks in a row. It all boils down to the same thing, tho. "click here to keep your account from being deactivated". Then all you have to do is enter your user ID and password on some random webpage and you are all set. I'm constantly surprised at the number of folks that fall for this sort of thing. If a random stranger asks you for your house or car keys, would you hand over your keys and point out which car/house is yours? If you did, you should not be surprised if your things get stolen. Actually, you can't call it theft at that point. It's a donation. So don't call me saying that your password was stolen. You gave it away, and likely compromised the entire network. Again. Thanks for your consideration. Also, you can't complain that your inbox is full of crap you didn't sent. In actuality, you did send it by giving a stranger your password.

What's my name?

Yes, I realize you are one of the more important folks in this organization, a big muckety-muck and all, but honestly. We have no idea what your personal email address is. We don't know your university password much less your personal one. Be a dear and keep up with that your self, OK Punkin? Thanks so much.